God's List

I like making lists— errand lists, grocery lists, project lists, etc. My favorite list, however, is called "Burt's List." This is the Honey-do list, the one wives eventually discover. What makes this list enjoyable is the feeling that as long as it is written down somewhere for the husband to see, eventually it will be done. (The operative word here is "eventually.")

But this morning, I discovered an even better list than the Honey-do. I call it "God's List." When I sat down to read my Bible, I put a notepad on the table beside me, resolving to jot down any errant thoughts that came to me while I concentrated.

It occurred to me that this is the way I need to deal with the annoying musings that come when I least expect them, such as, "What will you do if something happens to your husband?"... "What if you boys never get married?"... "How do you know [a symptom] isn't something serious?" Impressions not from God's Spirit have always been a nuisance, especially when our boys were growing up, the worries that plague moms. Looking back now, I see that none of those things happened.

So I'm forming a new list habit. From this day forward, I will have God's List beside me. The things that cause anxiety that are not the Voice of the Holy Spirit will be put on His list, and He will handle them as only He can.

Lila...look!

I'm studying about the Holy Spirit again. I say "again" because I have been on a 40-year quest to get to know Him, the One that Jesus promised to send us when He left the earth. To this end, I'm reading (again) a book written by Catherine Marshall entitled The Helper.

One of the chapters is about the way the Spirit helps us know how to pray. He enables us to see things the way that Jesus sees them, and when that happens, we know we are praying in God's will, and when that happens, we know our prayer is answered! (I John 5:14).

That's where I want to dwell: in the confidence that I'm praying in a manner to which God responds.

In order to do this, I have to learn to see a situation the way that Jesus sees it, and intercede the way that He would. That means I have to see things through His eyes. How do I do it?

This makes me think of our granddaughter, Lila. We'll see things that we think would be interesting to her. "Look, Lila! There's a hummingbird!" or "Look, there's a deer drinking from the pond!" She squints her eyes and peers everywhere but the right direction. Usually she's looking right in front of herself instead of further out. Then we take her little head in our hands and turn it toward the subject, and we try to send her eyes in a straight line at the end of our pointed finger. We want her to see what we're seeing. Sometimes she gets it, sometimes not.

That's me. I need God's hands on my head directing it, letting me see what's at the end of His pointed finger. Maybe He sees me the way we think about Lila: "When she matures, she'll see."

I pray that the Holy Spirit will show me how to look through Jesus's eyes.

Compelled to Write

I'm writing this morning because I am compelled to. Not that I've had multiple requests for postings (I wish!), but because I can't be content not to. The urge to let out whatever is trapped inside me won't go away. In the May/June 2010 edition of "Writer's Digest," Anne Lamott says about writing, "It's absolutely the most important thing you can do if that thing is inside you, tugging on your sleeve, hoping you'll notice it there, urging you to be one of the storytellers." It's there with me all right, like a child pulling on my clothes until I notice him.

I also attended a writer's workshop this past weekend, led by Penny Whipps, a literary agent and veteran in the publishing industry. Not that I expect to be published, but I went for two reasons: to accompany a close friend, and to be exposed to others who share my passion. In the seminar, Penny stressed the importance of tapping into the social network. I haven't given in yet to Facebook, etc., and everybody seems to have a blog. I stopped writing in this one because nobody read it (not even my children). But I know it's time to get back in public writing. I can express my feelings easily in my journal, but the challenge of penning something that anybody can see is intimidating. Nevertheless, I'm doing it. This is like spending endless hours shooting free throws after basketball practice. My skills will improve; my confidence will rise, and who knows? I might even post on Facebook!